House of Buggin': (Job Interview with the Vampire)

Lady: (on the phone) Yes, well I'm still trying to get that postion in accounting filled. Uh huh, Listen I'll have to call you later I have an applicant right now. Ok, bye bye. (hangs up)

So I understand you're looking for a job Mr..?

Lestat: Lestat

(music for title plays)

Lady: Well, did you bring a resume?
Lestat: (chuckles while handing over)

Lady: My, you certainly had alot of experience.

Lestat: (chuckles)
Lady: Well, let's see. In 1782 to 1783 it says you worked for a blacksmith, why did you leave?

Lestat: He died.
Lady: Oh, I'm sorry to here that.
Lestat: (chuckles)
Lady: Now in 1786, it says you worked for a law firm, what happened there?

Lestat: Oh, (waves hand) one of the lawyers died.
Lady: Really?

Lestat: Actually, all of them died! (laughs)

Lady: In 1792, the publiciser?
Lestat: (nods head) Died.
Lady: 1804, the tailor?

Lestat: I was..(looks guilty) fired for stealing.
Lady: I see.
Lestat: Just kidding, he died! (laughs)

Lady: (coughs) (buzzes on her intercom, startling Lestat) Vivian, would you bring me a sparkling water? Would you like anything Mr Lestat?
Lestat: No thanks, I brought my own.

Lady: So it seems like you took the whole 19th century off.
Lestat: Yes, I was trying to find myself.
Lady: Uh huh & since then you pretty much made a living by slaughting people, drinking their blood & plundering their assets.

Lestat: Yes, but I'm READY to get into sales! I'm really more of a people person.
Lady: Uh-huh.

(Vivian brings in water)
Lady: Oh, thank you.
Vivian: Here's your water.
Lady: Vivian, this is Mr Lestat.

(music plays)
Vivian: (trance like) Yes, we've met.

(Vivian leaves as Lestat waves & wiggles his tongue at her)
Lady: Now Mr Lestat, our bottom line here is we're looking for a self-starter with extensive office skills.

Lestat: Well, I can grant you enteral life, collect the souls of the innocent, read minds..
Lady: Word progress?
Lestat: No.
Lady: How about Excel for windows?
Lestat: No, but I'm told I have a very pleasant phone manner.
Lady: I'm sorry, Mr Lestat. However I will keep your application on file, but at the present time we just don't have anything for you.

Lesta: (rises) YES YOU DO.
Lady: (trance like) Yes we do.
Lestat: I'm extactly the type of person you're looking for.
Lady: You're extactly the type of person I'm looking for.
Lestat: You'll start me at 75.
Lady: I'm start you at (breaks out of trance) 75? What are you nuts?
Lestat: You'll start me at 50.
Lady: (back in trance) I'll start you at 50
Lestat: With full medical coverage.
Lady: With full medical coverage.
Lestat: Including... Dental!
Lady: Including dental.

(Lestat laughs & waves tongue as scene fads out)

Screen captures & transcript by Sara. Video uploaded onto YouTube by bugginvideos.